


The Lying Game

by slightly_salty_ace



Category: Spider-Man (Comicverse), Spider-Man - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Daily Bugle, M/M, Miscommunication, Misunderstandings, Spideypool - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-16
Updated: 2017-06-21
Packaged: 2018-11-14 17:59:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11213295
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slightly_salty_ace/pseuds/slightly_salty_ace
Summary: Spidey's love life spirals out of control when the Daily Bugle starts spreading rumors that he and Peter Parker are secret lovers. And things were just starting to work out between him and Deadpool, too!Also, the Avengers really want to meet Spider-man's new boyfriend, which is not helping. At all.





	1. I swear this is not the start to a bad porno

Spider-man stared in shock at the big black letter across the top of the Daily Bugle.

**_"Parker and Spidey Secret Lovers?"_ **

"What the hell...?" He frowned under his mask, his lenses narrowing in the process. A picture of Spider-man sneaking in through Peter Parker's window was directly under the headline. Usually, the web-slinger slept in Avengers Tower. He only used his apartment at Parker Industries on nights that he didn't go on patrol. But last night had been a particularly rough one and he had been careless. He sighed, letting his lenses relax. The headline could've been worse. Someone could've connected the dots and found out his secret identity. Spidey crumpled the paper up and tossed it into a nearby dumpster. "As if my love life wasn't already complicated."

Spidey checked the settings on his web shooters before launching himself into the air. It was nearly noon, and he was supposed to meet Stark at Avengers tower soon. _hopefully, none of the Avengers read the Bugle. I am not in the mood for answering questions._  Spider-man hissed as a web line was shot just a tad late, causing his feet to barely brush the top of a taxi. _Cap probably still reads the newspaper...but he usually minds his own business. Oh god, is Clint hears about this...or Wade...._ Hawkeye had been pestering Spider-man about his love life for the past year. And Wade...Spidey's heart fluttered at the thought of him. 

Within a few minutes, Spidey had reached the tower. He crawled along the ceiling, quickly making his way to the lab. He stayed on the ceiling even in the lab, silently scoping out what Tony Stark was working on.

"Tony, you have a serious bug problem." Clint pointed up at the ceiling.

Stark quickly spun around, "wha-oh. Get down from there, I just had that cleaned."

"You paid someone to clean a ceiling?" Spidey snorted as he let himself fall to the ground. He went over to his fellow scientist, tilting his head at the mess of metal parts on the table. He noticed a copy of the day's paper on the counter, but he ignored it.

"Sooo...why didn't you tell me you're gay?" Tony said after nearly half an hour.

"Excuse me?" Clint frowned.

"Not you, the webhead." Tony handed Clint the paper. Spider-man groaned. "You know you can trust us, right?"

"Obviously he doesn't! He won't even take off that mask!" Clint scoffed.

Tony ignored him, "there's this great gay bar that Cap and I go to. You should come along sometime. Bring Parker."

"No, no, we're not-"

Clint cut him off, "out? Gotcha. Why not bring him to game night on Friday? I can kick his ass at Mario Kart."

"I-I-we-" Spider-man stammered.

"Leave the kid alone, you guys," Steve ordered from the doorway. He had another copy of the paper in his hands. "It wasn't the Bugle's place to out Spider-man. He'll talk to us when he's ready."  
Deadpool walked in next to Cap. He didn't say a word, just stared at Spider-man with the cold white lenses of his mask. Spider-man stared right back at him. He had had a crush on the merc for awhile. He prayed to the gods that the Bugle hadn't just ruined his chances with Wade.

"Didn't know you were taken," Deadpool muttered before turning and leaving.

Spider-man wanted to curl up in the tightest ball possible and disappear.

"So, how long has this thing with Parker been going on?" Clint asked.

"Barton!" Steve scolded.

"What?! I'm just asking. Is this the reason why you're his bodyguard?"

"I always wondered how that guy managed to get such good pictures of you," Tony murmured.

Spider-man slammed his fist on the nearest surface, making everyone jump. "Parker is _NOT_ my boyfriend," he snarled.

"Damn, okay, okay," Clint held up his hands. "He's not your boyfriend. Why were you in his bedroom last night, then?"

One of Spidey's lenses twitched. "I lost a lot of blood while on patrol. He offered to patch me up."

Steve pinched the bridge of his nose, "Spider-man, we've been over this before. If you are badly hurt you need to come straight to _us_. What kind of medical background could the CEO of Parker Industries possibly have?"

Spider-man crossed his arms, "he's been helping me out since high school. He knows the basics, and I'm still alive, aren't I? Plus we have the same blood type, so it works out. My blood type is very rare...so yeah."

Tony narrowed his eyes. "You both have...radioactive blood?"

"Yeah. Runs in the family." Spider-man mentally smacked himself in the face. _Stop. Fucking. Talking._

"You're related?" Tony now looked more surprised than suspicious.

"He's my brother." _Great. I love lying and deceit._ Spidey thought sarcastically. He hurried out of the room right after that, something he should have done a long time ago.

"I thought Parker was an only child?" Steve said. 

Tony shrugged and went back to work, planning to further question the web slinger later.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed chapter one!  
> There have been a few times in the comics when other characters have thought Peter and Spidey are oddly close, and I wanted to see how far I could push that. Also, Peter is too stubborn to reveal his secret identity so this is going to be a wild ride.


	2. Star Wars Episode 2: Attack of the Clones

**_The next day_ **

Tony picked up a web shooter, carefully examining the small object. He was in Parker's personal lab at Parker Industries. Tony had come to meet with the scientist, unfortunately, he seemed to be missing. Anna Maria didn't seem too worried though, and let Tony wait in the lab. He took a seat on one of the stools as he fiddled with the web shooter.

A bit later Peter Parker himself hurried into the room, hastily buttoning up his shirt, his hair matted and sweaty.

Tony raised an eyebrow but said nothing.

"Why are you here, Stark?" Peter snatched the web shooter from the other man's hands.

"Just wanted to ask you some questions about your brother."

"Brother?" Peter stared blankly at Tony.

"Spider-man. He told me he was your brother?"

Peter blinked, having forgotten about the day before. "Oh...did he now?" He grumbled.

"So do you have spider powers, too?"

"You wanted to know more about my brother, so why are you questioning me?" Peter pulled a stool over to the table and sat down across from Stark.

"You two seem to be a packaged deal. He said you shared the same radioactive blood. So that must mean you both have spider powers." Tony picked up a different web shooter from the table, "are you the Spider-man in the black and red spandex?" Tony's eyes seemed to bore into Peter's soul.

"That's someone else. And I don't have spider powers. I don't know what Spidey told you, but he's not my real brother. He's adopted. We have nothing in common other than hair color." The lies fell from his mouth before he fully comprehended what he was saying. Years of lying to his aunt made this way too easy.

"Adopted, huh? Weird. You two are the same height, same voice, too, right down to the accent." Tony wasn't stupid.

"We were raised together in Queens. Of course, we have the same accent. Maybe he's a distant relative and that why we look alike? I never looked into it."

Tony ran a hand through his hair, "cut the shit, Parker. I know he's not your brother. I checked your records. The only family you got is May Parker."

"Shield erased my brother from every known record. Even photographs. Gave him a new identity to protect his old one. We had to when I started this company. Otherwise, anybody would've been able to figure out who he was just by looking at my Wikipedia page." Peter explained.

Tony leaned back, arms crossed. "So, what name does he go by now? It's kinda weird calling him Spider-man after all the years we've known each other."

"Go ask him yourself. Now please leave, I'm very busy today." Peter wanted this conversation to end before he dug himself into an even deeper hole.

"Alright," Tony stood up and stretched. "We're having game night this Friday at Avengers Tower. Cap makes us do it. Says it's good team building. Why not stop by?"

Peter shook his head, "I'm not an Avenger."

"Not yet. But you'd be a good asset to the team. You could work in the lab with me and Bruce," Tony offered. He still wasn't convinced Peter and Spider-man were brothers, and he was determined to find out the truth. A simple scan by his AI would tell him all he needed to know. He could've found out Spider-man's identity by scanning him the very first time they met, but he didn't. He wasn't all that interested in Spidey's real name. He just wanted to know if he really was related to Peter Parker. For science, of course.

"I'll think about it. Now, please leave, Stark."

* * *

  
"Wade!" Spider-man found the merc atop a building later that day.

"Hey, webs, what's up?" Deadpool's mask crinkled with a smile.

Spidey crouched next to him, "we're still cool, right?"

"Uh...yeah? Why wouldn't we be?" Deadpool raised an eyebrow, further skewing his mask.

"Well, you wouldn't talk to me at all yesterday-"

"Because I was upset you didn't tell me about your boyfriend! I thought we were best buds?!"

Spider-man tugged on his own mask in frustration. "We are! And Parker's not my boyfriend! He's my brother."

"Oh. Neat-o." Deadpool's face seemed to relax. He kicked his feet over the edge of the roof. "Do you two look alike?"

"What?"

"You and your brother. He's cute. If you look anything like him my heart wouldn't be able to take it!" Deadpool clutched his chest with on hand and threw his other arm across his forehead. Spidey punched his shoulder. He was glad the mask hid his blush. "You'll be with us on Friday, right?" Deadpool looped an arm around the other man's shoulders, tugging him closer.

"Right."

"Cool. Bring your bro. I wanna meet him."

"I don't think-"

"Neither do I, but it's worked out for me so far! I'll pick you guys up! I just got a new car, it's pretty rad." Deadpool kept on talking.

"Wade, I can get to the tower on my own-"

"Okay. I'll pick you guys up at five!!" Deadpool jumped to his feet and ran off before Spidey could argue.

"Well...fuck." He threw himself back on the roof. He stared blankly at the sky for a bit. Suddenly an idea popped into his head. It was a bad idea. He should just stay home, pretend to be sick and wait for this whole mess to be over. But instead, he took out his phone. Spider-man scrolled through the contacts until he found the name "Scarlet". Taking a deep breath, he called the number. "Please pick up...Kaine! Hey, buddy! Are you doing anything this Friday? Cause I really need you to do me a favor."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed! I'm having a lot of fun with this story!  
> The next chapter is fairly long, so it won't be out for a few days. Unless I decide to split it up.


	3. Monopoly is how you lose friends

_**PARKER INDUSTRIES** _

"Can't believe you talked me into this bullshit,"  
Kaine muttered, tugging at his tie. "At least this gives me the chance to make you look like an idiot."

"Stay still." Anna Maria ordered. She was currently covering Kaine's face in concealer, successfully hiding his scars.

"Please don't." Peter groaned as he tugged his mask on.

"Why can't I be Spider-man?" Kaine complained.

"You said you didn't want to deal with Deadpool's romantic and sexual advances-"

"And you do?"

"I will web your mouth shut."

"Hey, I'm not judging," Kaine smirked. "This is quite the mess you've gotten yourself into."

"Good entertainment for me," Anna Maria commented.

"Same here," Kaine said as he checked his reflection in a mirror Anna Maria had handed him. "I look weird as hell without the scars."

"Gee, thanks," Peter muttered, "Let's just get this over with." He stomped over to the elevator and held the door open for his brother.

Deadpool was waiting for them in the lobby. He darted over and tried to hug them both. Kaine ducked away, while Peter allowed the merc to embrace him. "Let's go boys!" Deadpool led the way to the garage, dragging Spidey by the arm. Kaine followed at a distance, a smirk on his lips.

* * *

  
**_AVENGERS TOWER_ **

Deadpool skipped off the elevator, heading straight for the snack table.

"Are you sure about this?" Kaine whispered to his brother.

"Of course not. But there's no going back now." Peter responded.

"Yes, there is," Kaine reached for the elevator buttons but Peter slapped his hand away.

The rest of the team were already present, sitting on the couches in the middle of the room. Tony was at the bar, a drink in one hand, and a tablet in the other. Tony frowned at the tablet. According to Friday, "Peter" and Spider-man were the same person. "Try again," he ordered. The AI silently scanned the two men in question and came up with the same answer. Tony pinched the bridge of his nose, "one must be a clone..."

"Clones?"

Tony looked up, jumping when he saw Spider-man standing directly on the other side of the bar. Spidey snatched the tablet and scrolled through the different charts.

"You scanned us? Rude." Spider-man leaned against the bar, still scrolling. Tony made a grab for the tablet but the web-slinger held it just out of reach. One of the very last things on the list was Spidey's true identity. He swiped through the settings on the tablet and rewrote some commands, deleting the information from Stark's records.

"It was for science. Are you erasing stuff? Stop that!" Tony snatched the tablet back. "Half the stuff is gone!"

"No shit." Spidey scoffed. "You have no right to that information."

Tony sighed heavily and set the tablet aside. "Which one of you is the clone?" Spider-man straightened up, and Tony was almost certain he was smirking under the mask.

"What do you think?"

Tony leaned forward, his eyes narrowed, studying the masked face before him. Spidey decided to humor him, leaning forward as well. At this close proximity, Tony could just barely make out the other man's eyes behind the lenses.

"Oh, my god, kiss already!" Clint smacked Tony in the back of the head. "Or move out of the way, you're blocking the alcohol."

Spider-man chuckled and went back over to the others. He stood next to his brother behind the couch, one arm resting on the other man's shoulder.

Cap noticed the similarities between them when they had first walked in. They had the same height and build. "Peter" hadn't spoken much, other than a gruff "Hey" and "don't touch me". But if Steve hadn't been looking he would've mistaken the voice for Spider-man's. Steve's phone pinged with a text.

Stark: **_they're not brothers. One's a clone._**

Steve glanced up at Tony, who was still at the bar. He texted back, _**What are you on about**_ ** _?_  **

Stark: _**I think the clone is the one in tights.**_

Steve: _**you think our teammate...the guy who was been Spider-man for over a decade...is a clone?**_

Stark: **_Yes! And I have proof! Parker's "brother" doesn't exist. No known records, nothing. Parker said S.H.E.I.L.D. erased the records and gave Spider-man a new identity to protect both of them. But Fury says otherwise. I'm positive Spider-man is a clone. It's why he holds his secret identity so close! Because his identity belongs to another man!_**

Steve shook his head and replied, **_stop watching conspiracy videos on youtube. They're messing with your head._**  Tony responded with another long-winded text, but Steve had already turned off his phone.

The rest of the night went on without issue. Other than Clint flipping over the monopoly board. Natasha instantly started passing out Uno cards, a desperate attempt to divert everyone's attention from a potential fight between Clint and "Peter".

Spider-man slipped away to get some fresh air, Deadpool following close behind him.

"Hey! Don't leave me here, your little punk!" Kaine yelled at Spider-man, who had already disappeared up the stairs to the balcony.

"Scared I'll beat your ass if you're brother ain't here to protect you?" Clint held up his fists, ready to fight.

"You should be the one who's scared! He was the only thing holding me back!" Kaine made a move to lunge for the Archer but Steve caught him by the shoulder.

"Behave. Both of you." The Captain ordered.

Meanwhile, Spidey and Deadpool were sitting on the balcony, overlooking the city. The sun had long since set and a beautiful array of city lights danced across the horizon.

"This is nice," Deadpool whispered.

"Hm?"

"Just the two of us," Deadpool's hand brushed over Spider-man's. "There aren't many times when we're alone together. Other than patrols, I mean."

Spider-man looked over at the merc. The larger man was half hidden in the shadows, the street lights casting a soft yellow glow onto him.

"Are...are you doing anything tomorrow night?" Spider-man whispered.

"Are you asking me out on a date, bug-boy?"

"Maybe."

"Will this date involve chasing robbers, or guest appearances by one of your animal themed supervillains?"

Spider-man shuddered. "Oh god, I hope not!"

"Any other secret boyfriends I should worry about? Or other family members that the Bugle seems to think you are in relations with?" Deadpool wiggled his eyebrows.

"Stop."

Deadpool giggled, "Okay, serious question, though; are you going to tell me your name? Kinda weird going on a date with someone when you don't know their name."

"That's what blind dates are."

"Oh come ooooon! You know my name! Why can't I know yours? Don't you trust me?"

Spider-man opened his mouth to reply but was cut off by an explosion and glass shattering. "What the hell?!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Decided to split the chapter up into three parts because reasons.  
> Hope you enjoyed this one!  
> I don't know much about Kaine other than what I've read in Spider-verse, the Clone Conspiracy, and his brief appearance in Superior Spider-man, so I hope I got his character somewhat right?


	4. Things go south. Or do they?

_**A few moments before** _

Kaine's spider-sense suddenly started pounding in the back of his head. He looked up to see something humanoid and green flying straight for them. "What the...? Fuck!!" The green creature had launched an orange object at the window.

_**BOOM** _

The window shattered, but luckily Kaine had managed to kick the table up just in time, shielding the Avengers from most of the glass.

"What the fuck?" Kaine heard his brother shout from the balcony.

Osborn slowly glided into the room, "where is Parker?"

"Is that Osborn?! I thought he kicked the can?!" Tony gasped, as he spoke his armor began to form around him.

Steve stepped out from behind the table, "what do you want with Parker?" He slowly reached for his shield. The Goblin made no move to stop him.

"That's between me and him. I know he's here...I have a knack for finding that bug..." Osborn snickered.

Spider-man and Deadpool crept to the edge of the stairs, ready to jump down on the goblin. Everyone else already had their various weapons drawn. Now it was just a matter of who shot first.

Rage bubbled up inside of Spider-man, boiling his blood and turning his vision red. Every horrible thing the Goblin had done to Peter and his loved ones...every single awful moment raced through his mind. Forget being the better man, Spider-man wanted to rip Osborn to shreds right then and there. Steve glanced up at the arachnid, shaking his head ever so slightly. The Captain didn't want Spider-man to be a part of this fight, knowing the wall-crawler would do something he'd regret.

That's when all hell broke lose.

Tony blasted a hole through the table right as Spider-man leaped down from the stairs. The repulsor struck one of the glider's wings, while Spidey landed on the Goblin himself. Osborn twirled around in mid air, doing his best to block the arachnid's punches.

Natasha jumped up and aimed at the goblin, "Spidey! Stop moving and give me a clear shot!"

"I got this!" Steve darted forward, jumped up and grabbed the glider's other wing, bringing them crashing down to the floor. Natasha fired a single shot at the Goblin's chest, not knowing that he had more pumpkin bombs hidden under his tunic.

BANG

One of the bombs went off, sending Osborn, Spidey, and Steve flying in different directions. Green smoke filled the room. Everyone was in a slight daze until it started to clear. Steve groaned as he slowly pushed himself onto his hands and knees.

Spider-man lay sprawled out on his back, his shoulder badly injured from the blast. Blood was quickly pooling around him.

The Goblin mounted what was left of the glider and puttered out the window.

"Where do you think you're going, you BASTARD?!" Kaine sprinted towards Osborn.

"Peter, don't!!" Clint tried to grab him but was too slow.

Kaine leaped out the window, jumping a far greater distance than any human should have been able too. He landed on the Goblin's back, sending them both spiraling down to the nearest rooftop. Kaine jumped off just in time, landing in a crouch a few feet away.

"There's two of you?!" The Goblin hissed. "So, which clone are you?"

Kaine didn't answer, instead, he punched the Goblin in the face, not hard enough to kill, but hard enough that he heard bone cracking. Osborn screeched in pain and crumpled to his knees. Kaine kicked him in the gut, knocking him back a few feet. He continued beating on the older man. At some point, the Goblin stopped fighting back. He wasn't sure if Osborn was alive or not. All he knew was that there was a hell of a lot of blood on both men. And Peter. Oh, God, Peter. The image of his brother lying in a pool of his own blood flashed in Kaine's mind.

Kaine quickly webbed Osborn to the roof, just in case he was still able to run away. He then swung back up the tower, launching himself back through the broken window. Everyone was gathered around Spider-man, who was still on the floor. Steve was pressing a piece of cloth to Spider-man's shoulder, while Tony ran to get the first aid kit from behind the bar.

Deadpool gently lifted Spidey's head into his lap, "we're gonna patch you up, okay? You're gonna be okay...just fine..." Deadpool cupped the other man's face with his hands, brushing his thumbs back and forth over Spider-man's cheeks.

"I've had worse." Spider-man didn't seem concerned at all. And he didn't show any pain until Tony dumped alcohol on his wound. "OW."

"You could've lost an arm!" Deadpool scolded.

"But I didn't," Spider-man shifted around, trying to get comfortable.

"You still could if you don't stop moving. You lost a lot of blood, son." Steve sighed. Bruce shooed both Steve and Tony away and got to work on stitching up the wound.

Kaine knelt down next to his brother, "I took care of the Goblin." Most of the makeup had come off during the brief brawl, revealing the scars beneath.

"Dude, are you okay?" Clint gasped.

Kaine huffed, "I'm fine."

"So, you have Spider powers, too?" Natasha said.

Kaine shrugged, "runs in the family."

"Well, it's a good thing you're family because Spidey here is going to need some blood," Bruce spoke up. He had just finished the stitches and was wrapping gauze around Peter's shoulder.

"I think I'll be fine," Peter muttered, sitting up with a little help from Deadpool. "I just need some rest."

"Let me take him back to Parker Industries, if something goes wrong we'll be able to handle it," Kaine said suddenly.

"I'm just as capable-" Bruce started.

"Actually you're not. There's a reason he comes to us instead of you when he's hurt," Kaine crossed his arms. In all honesty, he just didn't want to spend the night at the tower. He hated the freak show that was New York and wanted to get back to his own city as soon as possible. Thankfully, no one argued with him.

* * *

  
Deadpool glanced over at the passenger's seat. Peter was slouched down with his feet propped up on the dashboard. His eyes were glued to the windshield, watching the rain slip down the glass. At least, Deadpool thought they were. That mask just made everything difficult. Was Spidey even awake? Was he breathing? Deadpool reached over and touched his chest.

"What are you doing?" Peter's head swiveled in Deadpool's direction. Even with Spidey talking, Deadpool wasn't satisfied until he felt the gentle rise and fall of the other man's chest.

"Just making sure," Deadpool whispered. He glanced in the rearview mirror. Kaine was staring at him from the back seat. "You know, you don't have to wear makeup. Scars aren't bad, you don't need to hide them."

"Says the guy who wears a mask 24/7." Peter snorted.

"You're one to talk, Mr. I-like-you-but-not-enough-to-tell-you-my-name."

Peter kept his mouth shut. Kaine kicked the back of his seat, causing Peter to hiss in pain.

"Just tell him, you idiot. This has gone on long enough." Kaine snarled, "my God, you take playing hard to get to a whole new level!!" They were currently stopped at a red light, so Kaine got out of the car. "I'll walk the rest of the way." Kaine disappeared down the sidewalk before either man could stop him.

Peter slid further down the seat. This new position made his shoulder ache but he ignored it. The steady rain was the only thing that broke the silence. Deadpool pulled over into an alley and turned off the car.

"What are you doing?" Peter asked.

"Don't you trust me?" Wade took off his own mask.

"With my life."

"Spidey...if you really don't want to tell me who you are...then that's okay. I understand how important this is to you. But if we're going to date, then I need to know. Otherwise, this isn't going to work out. And you know that."

Spider-man was silent for several minutes, staring blankly ahead as he considered all his options. Slowly, he reached up and pulled off the mask.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed this chapter!

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed chapter one!  
> There have been a few times in the comics when other characters have thought Peter and Spidey are oddly close, and I wanted to see how far I could push that. Also, Peter is too stubborn to reveal his secret identity so this is going to be a wild ride.


End file.
